I came across an article the other day discussing an MD's work on identifying "stress signatures." According to Stephanie McClellan, MD, there are 4 stress profiles she thinks women exhibit. (Which one sounds like you?)
While this work is geared towards women, the research on her hypothesis is in its infancy, and the research on stress is very complex and being done in many disciplines, it brings up an important point: it's worth our time to built awareness about our experience of and reactions to stress. As aptly stated by Dr. James LaValle, "we are a primitive nervous system in a modern world." Our human system (mind and body) are built to respond to "threats" in order to help us be energy efficient and keep us safe. And in today's "always on" culture, stress is a part of performance and life in more ways than our mind and body were initially built for (check out this 60 Minutes episode where about 10 minutes in they show Anderson Cooper's stress reactivity to his phone notifications).
So, get to know your stress profile. What triggers stress for you? Is your reaction one of defeat, negativity, pessimism, tension, reactivity, demotivation, control, worry, overthinking, isolation...something else? On the other hand, do you embrace stress and feel energized by it? What's your typical tendency? Why? What situations/contexts trigger different reactions? Why? What's your reaction to immediate stressors versus as they build up over time? To daily hassles versus bigger stressors? When does your reaction to stress help you perform optimally versus create an obstacle? Do you tend to view (and think/talk about) stress negatively or positively?
Get to know what triggers your stress, who you are under stress, and what the consequences are. And if you find there are ways your reaction isn't working for you or those you lead or are on a team with, then you can do something about. You can shift your mindset about stress, implement strategies, train your mind, etc. (consider doing all this with a mental performance coach who can guide and support you through this).
Stress can make us feel out of control and be a big distraction since we then often start to focus on things we can't control/influence or get stuck focusing on how we're reacting knowing that it's an obstacle to our performance. Getting to know who you are under stress and how it impacts you/others is the first step to putting the control back into your hands and helping you build and strengthen your resilience. It's like NBCUniversal's long-standing PSA initiative started in the late 80s reminds us "the more you know..."